Things to Remember When a Friendship Ends

Things to Remember , When a Friendship Ends.

NPR spoke with the author of 'Platonic: How the Science of Attachment Can Help You Make — And Keep — Friends,' Marisa Franco.

She gave advice if you're dealing with losing a friend.

.

1.

Remember that things simply fizzle out sometimes, A 2009 study found that on average, every seven years, people lose close to half of their friends.

Nobody really necessarily wanted the friendship to end, but people kind of got busy and didn't intentionally maintain the friendship, Marisa Franco, author of 'Platonic: How the Science of Attachment Can Help You Make — And Keep — Friends,' via NPR.

2.

Say things you've withheld, Address issues instead of pulling away.

For me, ... in the past I would withdraw, and thus the friendship would no longer be sustainable.

But now I know that if I want to withdraw, that's a sign.

That's a sign that I need to have a conversation about something, Marisa Franco, author of 'Platonic: How the Science of Attachment Can Help You Make — And Keep — Friends,' via NPR.

3.

Grief over a lost friendship is normal, Allow yourself the time to feel these emotions.

We think ... What's wrong with me?

Instead of being like ... of course I'm sad.

Of course I'm upset.

Like I lost someone I'm very close to.

That means I love them deeply.

.... This is a natural part of intimacy and loss, Marisa Franco, author of 'Platonic: How the Science of Attachment Can Help You Make — And Keep — Friends,' via NPR.

4.

Express your emotions, Grief doesn't have a timeline.

Grief is just a process of continuously releasing emotion and little nuggets over time.

If there's a friend that makes me feel safe, and no matter what you share with them, they're going to validate it and acknowledge the extent of the loss, Marisa Franco, author of 'Platonic: How the Science of Attachment Can Help You Make — And Keep — Friends,' via NPR.

5.

Be nice to yourself, The loss of the friendship isn't necessarily your fault and doesn't mean you won't have other meaningful friendships.

Just because this happened like this doesn't mean more friendships will happen like this, Marisa Franco, author of 'Platonic: How the Science of Attachment Can Help You Make — And Keep — Friends,' via NPR